When you’ve been married for awhile it can be easy to fall into routines. You know, where things start to just happen in a cycle. Things like dinner is at six every night or trash gets picked up every Tuesday. It can start to feel like you’re doing the same thing on the same day over and over. Even when it comes to sex we sometimes take the easy route and just do what works – routines are sneaky that way. It gets to the point that for some couples, sex is scheduled for a certain day of the week (or worse). But that won’t do, sex should be the last thing to fall into a routine. That’s where the quickie is so valuable.
Before we go on let’s make sure we’re all on the same page as far as our definition of a quickie goes. We all know that they can be overused. Sex shouldn’t be about one partner basically using the other as a masturbation device. It also shouldn’t be the norm. When we talk about a quickie we generally think of them as a good thing. To us a quickie is not just having sex without much foreplay. It’s more on the lusty side (lusting after your own spouse is perfectly fine) and less of the romantic side of the sexual spectrum. A quickie is the type of sex where you rip each others clothes off as soon as you can get alone and just get after it. It is where the fun of foreplay is replaced by the thrill of being in the moment. It’s kind of animalistic, but in a good way. And even the least spontaneous person enjoys a spur of the moment romp every now and then.
Now that our definition is clear, it’s easy to see how a quickie can be a fun way to break up a monotonous sex life or at least be incorporated into an already good one. The key is spacing them out in a way that works for you. In some marriages, it could be several times a week while in others once every few months will be enough. It pretty much depends on the amount of quality sex you normally have, because quickies are a lot of fun when used right.
Think of a quickie like salt in your favorite soup. The bigger the pot, the more you can use. But too much can ruin the whole batch. Depending on quickies to fulfill both partners sexual needs is a guarantee that someone is going to be left wanting more, or even feeling used.
Quickies aren’t always seen as a positive thing, especially when they’re overused. By finding a balance in your own sex life by using strategically placed quickies though, you can keep from falling into a rut. So what are you waiting for? The clock is ticking!
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